A "Grand" Relationship

Sometimes life seems like a chapter of goodbyes

Grand: impressive in size, appearance, or general effect.

Grand: noble or revered.

Grand: of great importance, distinction, or pretension.

There is always something special when you refer to something as "grand", like a grand palace in the UAE, a grand ballroom in an urban or a grand potentate in a state. In music, "grand" connotes a song written on a large scale for a large ensemble.

In a family, the people who we refer to as "grand" are those who have conceived the man and the woman who have biologically created us, those who have come way way before us, those who have had white hairs - or are struggling to hide those - when the first strand of our hairs have just grown. We call "grand" the mothers and fathers of our mother and father, those who we call Lolo and Lola in the Filipino vernacular. Our grandmother, our grandfather. Our family's "grand".

Grand: Does not only connote superiority tantamount to old age and more experiences. More importantly, superiority in terms of knowing more, loving more, hurting more, sacrificing more, believing more, hoping more. Living more. Who have been waiting for the lame knocks of the fists of death on their rusty gates, but still hope to see the daughters and sons of their daughters and sons go rung by rung on the ladder of life. They who they also call "grand". Their granddaughters and grandsons, those who they call apo in the vernacular.

There seems to be a "grand" relationship existing between these two age-separated generations yet deem each other "grand". Grandmothers and grandfathers stand as greatest forces for arriving at an agreed consent (kunsintidor at kunsintidora) when mothers and fathers do not understand the sentiments of their sons and daughters - the granddaughters and grandsons. From late wake-up calls to late night arrival at home, from what-to-give and what-not-to-give, from what-to-say and what-not-to-say. The concept of generation gap seems to be absurd when it comes to the relationship between grandmothers and granddaughters, or between grandfathers and grandsons.

Papunta ka pa lang, pabalik na ako. That's what they usually say. However, amazing as it may seem, they do not go straightly to where they have started. Because they stop at one point and more to check on the condition of their "grands". Monitor them when they trip or stumble or fall. Despite cracking bones, swelling muscles, and immobile tendons, they struggle to run from where they are towards their beloved "grands" come to their aid.

Sa gitna ng pagbabalik, tumitigil upang pagmasdan ang pagpunta sa patutunguhan ng mga papunta pa lamang. Grandmothers and grandfathers standing as backbones for their granddaughters and grandsons. If parents are the wind beneath children's wings, they are feathers on the children's wings.

This is what I will miss mostly from my Lola.

Here comes goodbye. Here comes the last time. Sometimes life seems like a chapter of goodbyes.

Just when I have been asking for a moment to talk to Daddy from heaven, God has taken you from us. Say hello to Daddy from me. Embrace me in my dreams, Lola. The sweetness of God's smile upon your entry into the heaven's gate makes me feel better.

"Grand" will never be taken away from us. Grandmother-granddaughter. Always grand.