January 22, 2010.
I learned something that made me thankful for what happened on December 18, 2008. And regretted a quarter of me that mourned for a loss which I thought was truly worth mourning for. BUT IT WAS NOT.
But no room for regrets, for the inexplicable feeling of contentment and gratitude impeccably outweigh those regrets.
Truly, Prayers - both answered and unanswered - are all heard.
Indeed, when one door closes, windows would eventually open. And the windows that have opened: more than the worth of the door that has unexpectedly closed.
When you are bitter, admit that you are. Compassion would always stay in your heart, but a lingering pain could never be denied. Just feel it. Eventually, your compassion would dawn upon you, giving you hope for the bitterness to fade. Then slowly, but surely, it will fade.
IT JUST DID.
But now, I don't want connections. Any, I guess. I have forgiven - long ago. But forget? I could not find it in my definition of terms.
Because forgiving is letting down of your compassion, but forgetting is foregoing of the lessons.
I don't want to forget, because lessons would always stay. Not anguish. Not pain. Not bitterness. But the lessons. Yes, the lessons.
What a small world it is. And what a tricky play of our self-manipulated cards.
God does not play dice on our lives, but He does integrate all our dice in order for us to meet, greet, play, eat, speak with people with whom He knows we would benefit from. God does not give us the people we want. Instead, He gives us the people we need: to teach us, to hurt us, to love us, and to make us exactly the way we should be.
It's interdependence. A give-and-take relationship. A two-way process. And supposedly, a vicious cycle, if the purpose is to remain with it forever.
Life is not a game of plain, uncontrollable chances. It's a game of making choices vis-a-vis taking chances.
And moving on and letting go.
Of forgiving. But not forgetting.
Of closing doors. And mending ways.
I learned something that made me thankful for what happened on December 18, 2008. And regretted a quarter of me that mourned for a loss which I thought was truly worth mourning for. BUT IT WAS NOT.
But no room for regrets, for the inexplicable feeling of contentment and gratitude impeccably outweigh those regrets.
Truly, Prayers - both answered and unanswered - are all heard.
Indeed, when one door closes, windows would eventually open. And the windows that have opened: more than the worth of the door that has unexpectedly closed.
When you are bitter, admit that you are. Compassion would always stay in your heart, but a lingering pain could never be denied. Just feel it. Eventually, your compassion would dawn upon you, giving you hope for the bitterness to fade. Then slowly, but surely, it will fade.
IT JUST DID.
But now, I don't want connections. Any, I guess. I have forgiven - long ago. But forget? I could not find it in my definition of terms.
Because forgiving is letting down of your compassion, but forgetting is foregoing of the lessons.
I don't want to forget, because lessons would always stay. Not anguish. Not pain. Not bitterness. But the lessons. Yes, the lessons.
What a small world it is. And what a tricky play of our self-manipulated cards.
God does not play dice on our lives, but He does integrate all our dice in order for us to meet, greet, play, eat, speak with people with whom He knows we would benefit from. God does not give us the people we want. Instead, He gives us the people we need: to teach us, to hurt us, to love us, and to make us exactly the way we should be.
It's interdependence. A give-and-take relationship. A two-way process. And supposedly, a vicious cycle, if the purpose is to remain with it forever.
Life is not a game of plain, uncontrollable chances. It's a game of making choices vis-a-vis taking chances.
And moving on and letting go.
Of forgiving. But not forgetting.
Of closing doors. And mending ways.
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