Upload of Realizations

Currently, I am waiting for the complete upload of our Christmas Party photos in TOMCAT - with EdTech - in Multiply. To break the gap between doing nothing and doing many things, I browse on Coelho Stories for Parents, Children and Grandchildren which I have found in the "Shared Documents" of our PC. I remember, I have downloaded this when Coelho has plurked about the limited free download of his works - including novels which have all been my favorite. This is among his works that I haven't read so far during that time, and so I have decided to seize the moment - and be like a hacker clicking tabs to penetrate portals of private letters and words.

Similar to Like the Flowing River, Coelho Stories for Parents, Children and Grandchildren contains random stories that mostly impart values to readers. And this is what I like most about Coelho - he has the ability to transport you into a utopia of values, dreams, and good things, conferring you the spirit of hope, willpower, and the ability to conquer the world.

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Before reading Coelho's work, I have chanced upon Karen's blog. I feel a dint of sadness upon reading her latest entry which states, "I am abandoning this temporarily".

Karen is among my few friends who I am utmostly comfortable sharing thoughts with. At some point, I guess, the wavelengths of our philosophy in life intersect - hers is among the blogs which I read first when I bloghop. Thus, upon seeing those words of temporary blog leave, I feel a little sad. However, it's just temporary. "When things fall back into place, I'll get back here in cyberspace," she hopefully says.

Dragging down the scroll bar a little farther, I read her entry about our first shooting for our documentary in SPU-QC. There, she has cited thoughts on pursuing law after our Communications degree. With willpower and determination, she wants to pursue the profession. Be that as it may, she has expressed a dash of uncertainty as to her reason on taking up law. I reserve her her reasons; my point is: She wants to be a lawyer. And she won't ever give up on her dream.

She is going to be back on her blog after a hiatus.

She has a heart of law. She will be a lawyer.

Only that, she has a smidgen of uncertainty in her heart. Because of fear? Vague speculations? Contradicting dictates of heart and mind?

Fear. Vague speculations. These are not hers, but mine.

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I have read this story in Coelho's work, titled "The Desire must be Strong":

A teacher took his disciple to a lake.

'Today, I'm going to show you what true devotion means,' he said. He asked his disciple to wade with him into the lake, then he grasped the boy's head and held it under the water.

The first minute passed. In the middle of the second minute, the boy was struggling as hard as he could to free himself from his teacher's hands and return to the surface. At the end of the second minute, the teacher released him. The boy stood up, heart pounding, gasping for breath.

'You tried to kill me!' he screamed.

The teacher waited for him to calm down and said: 'I wasn't trying to kill you; if I had been, you wouldn't be here now. I just wanted to find out what you felt when you were under the water.'

'I felt as if I was dying! All I wanted was to be able to breathe a little air.'

'Exactly. True devotion only appears when we have only one desire and we will die if we cannot achieve it.'


Karen's devotion is law. Her pipes for breathing are laws, logic and cases. My pipes for breathing are letters, words and events. My devotion is story-telling, story-writing, story-correlating. In academic terms, Journalism.

I know in my heart and mind that what I want is to be broadcast journalist - no more, no less. But I have fear and vague speculations.

Fear: because in a world where speaking out the truth guarantees you no safety other than death threats, being a journalist seem to be a dreadful profession. Vague speculations: my dreams are so high, so big, so vast. I standing on the North pole of the Earth: that's how small I think I am as compared to the dream that I have in my heart and mind. How do I can be as big as the world of my dream? Again, no guarantees.

But as the teacher in the story says, "True devotion only appears when we have only one desire and we will die if we cannot achieve it." Given my utmost desire for the craft - and the dream that I have in mind - I guess death is the abyss where I am going to fall to if I don't achieve what I want.

The water where my Teacher will be holding my head under - that seems so near. It is so near. This is not a mirage anymore. It is already the oasis. But it is in that oasis where my desire is going to be tested. How long will I be able to hold my breath?

As long as I can. So long, and I can.