Changing Places

I'm soon to leave this blog - and delete this as well - as I get my posts in here that are worthy to keep (for my compilation of literary works). Also my all-time favorite blog (my first), the one I've entitled Codes of the Reincarnated Warrior.

I already have a new one. My blog where I am going to be at for a lifetime. :)

Isang Liriko ng Pusong Bigo

ni: Jamelle Ann Catapusan At Jett Obejas

Sa bawat simbolo, letra at salita,
may kwentong nakakubli.
At sa bawat kwentong nakakubli,
may buhay na nabubuo.

Mga tala na kumikislap
at mga ulap na umaagos
sa sayaw ng hanging amihan.
Ang ihip ng hangin ay buhay sa atin.

Ihip ng hangin na malamig
- hanggang sa lamig ay mamimilipit.
Maghahanap ng bisig na kakapit.
Kasindilim ng langit ang damdaming sakdal-pait.

Ibaon mo sa bulalakaw
ang hangad mong kumabila,
bitawan ang buhay na pinaka-iingatan,
walang mas nakasasabik sa kalabit ng kamatayan.

May pusong nag-uumapaw sa ligaya,
at may damdaming namimighati.

Katapusan ang kinukubling kwento
ng huling tuldok sa salita.

**********

Constructed out of connected lines of responses of Jamelle and Jett, from my Facebook status "Sa bawat simbolo, letra at salita, may kwentong nakakubli."

God's Speedy Response

From a God of possibilities, a God of answers.

Partly diminishing the stains of doubt in my heart, I have chanced upon Nicolai's blog (through Julie's link in "My Followers'" option) which spoke of these words of strength:

when you decide about something, you think about it.
dont haste, stand up on your decision.
be firm and dont let any words from other mouths serenade, tempt or bring you down.
you are decided, go for it!

Truly, God speaks to us in various ways.

Because your essence is amongst my greatest loves

Dear Blogger,

My heart leaped in joy when I saw you again. Truly, your essence is amongst my greatest loves. There have been so many good words and great thoughts that could have been written in the one and a half-month that I haven't kept in touch with you. But I have been hesitant to jot it down. I'm sorry with myself. I can't explain: I wanted to write, but I just could not.

In the meantime, my heart is divided into two junctures: on the right are veins filled with dreams, hope, love and faith; on the other are capillaries of fear, anger and frustration. In simple terms, I know what I want, but I am just not sure how I could get there. You now what I am talking about - I have been sharing thoughts with you since I started writing sensibly, above all, since I started dreaming wild and big.

Truly, we have a BIG GOD who has always been generous in answering prayers and giving omens to wake us up from false dreams to real ones. And He has just spoken to me last night - and in the weeks that passed - by way of both important and new people. Thank Him for the hope and the Dream that He has planted in my heart. But human frailty strikes again; and now, I am again feeling a dint of fear in my heart.

I want to conquer this fear like a man achieving his dream of climbing to the crest of Mount Everest. I have already spotted my mountain from afar; nonetheless, where I am now, I could not vividly see a clear path to the site where the mountain is.

But I shall do so. And you will always be with me, as I have been with you.

Because, dear blogger, your essence is amongst my greatest loves. And, I guess, a path of petals leading to my mountain: conquering my fear, relinquishing the left portion of my heart filled by anger and frustration.

A day will come when thou shall be important in the list of reads by people.

That is why my heart leaped in joy when I saw you again.

Loving you for the privacy and the passion that is injected onto me,

jamellean

The Free Birds of the Sky

For my fellow Graduates, batch 2010.

We are now as free as the birds ready to wander the sky with no limits. Cages have been opened up for our eagle's strength to be displayed in front of the crowd awaiting for our graceful exit. Our wings have been fashioned and assured of its robustness.

Our eyes have been cleared of the real colors of the world that we may not be deceived. Black has been vividly distinguished from white, green from blue, red apart from pink. But we have always been taught to shine as brightly as yellow - as lustrous as the sun flashes its rays in the middle of each day.

Just as we have been trained to fly above hills, the gods have now endowed us the freedom to discover the height of the mountains. We have learned in Mathematics that a length with an equation of x/0, wherein x is a real number, is considered indefinite. What a waste of time to study such a vague concept. Nonetheless, the time has now come for us to be tested of how much we understand the logic of Mathematical expressions, formula and equations. The "indefiniteness" of the length of our own mountains - that is our dreams - which we now try to calculate in order to come up with our own equations of life.

We shall face the world with the fluency of our language and our grammatical correctness. When others seem to sing their song out of tune, with an incomprehensible use of words, may we remain faithful to how our elder birds sang beautiful music as we sing the tunes of our own lives. Let us fill the world with good words and splendid music, with our freshest voices and finely-tuned melodies and pitches.

Science has taught us that the sun is 91 million miles away from our planet. When our dreams start to seem unreachable, let us remember that scientists have been able to calibrate the distance of the Earth to the sun - however impossible it may be. As wise men always advice us, "If there's a will, there's a way".

We have been introduced to holy personalities named Buddha, Rama, Krishna, Shiva, Allah, Jesus. We have learned that other people live without believing in a greater power - that is, a god - which the world calls an atheist. But our mentors in religion and good morals have taught us to respect one another's beliefs and practices, because the worth of a person cannot really be defined on what he/she believes in, but how he/she lives out what he/she believes in.

And with that, we have been taught to look up once in a while, put our hands together and utter a prayer to our God who is omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent. However we call Him/Her, he listens to all languages and accepts all good practices.

When you believe, somehow you will. You when you believe. Just as we have reached this far, we shall reach farther - the farthest distance of our dreams.

We are now as free as the birds ready to wander the sky with no limits.

Melting Ices in the Pail for Bath

I saw a water-filled drum in front of me, where I could soak myself to refresh and relax after a long and tiring day. However, the water was full of ice on top - the mist and fume coming from its coldness seemed to play zig-zag in the air. And so I must first let the ice transform into water again. Lessen the iciness to make it bearable and give a sense of justice to my worthy bath.

I closed my eyes and laid my back on the tiles as I watched the ice cubes melt on water. Each ice seemed to resemble the things that have transpired today - from the moment I woke up down to this ice-cold bath.

The first ice melt: holding the Bible and reading verses for the day as I whispered a prayer of Thank You's and supplications to the One who has made all things in Heaven and on Earth. Drinking glasses of water after fixing my bed stuffs, eating a Mister Donut Twist for breakfast, taking a good morning bath, checking out my to-do list for the day to keep me sane.

Mist continued to engulf above the pail. More ice to melt.

The second ice melt: dropping by the shoe-fixer for my most favorite Grendha sandals to be nursed after two years of almost-everyday-use. Heading to school for the third to the last episode of the Thomasian News Bites (TNB) where we, graduating seniors of our media organization, were tasked to do the last week airing of this daily news program. Anchoring for TNB with Wado, laughing our heart out loud with Alexis' sweetness bordering to flirting with him. Lunch with TOMCAT friends.

Water level was moving upwards as ice layers became thinner.

The third ice to melt: a visit to the Philippine Society for Orphan Disorders ' (PSOD) office at Greenhills for the handing-over of the documentary that we have produced as part of our film class. Chatting for half-an-hour with Mrs. Cynthia Magdaraog, president of PSOD, who I considered to be one of the most fluent women I have spoken with ever in my entire life. Hi-hello-how-are-you with Dickoy who have touched my heart dearly when I interviewed him for our documentary. A wine of gratitude for their kindness and openness to our production team which aided us to successfully complete our course in Film class.

Fume hovering above lessened as minutes passed by.

The fourth ice to melt: a wandering trip at Greenhills with Judy ,where she bought her new phone in exchange for a lost one. And seeing a little girl kneeling in front of a fellow young boy - crying as if lost in the mall. Not that she was lost, but someone threw something at her that made her cry like there was no tomorrow.

Water level continued to rise. Less ice, more liquid.

The fifth ice to melt: a trip back to school for a promise to Alexis to be with him in their Dokyu Fest's awards night. A university-wide competition where their documentary was fortunate to be a finalist; nonetheless, unlucky to be a disqualified entry. With embittered heart, Judy and I watched him accept an award that was not his (for the MTV which his classmates produced which qualified and won numerous awards in the MTV category), with a low spirit because of the disqualification of his documentary. Ironically, still having hindered, high hopes for the salvation of his production.

Little ice played with the water. Ice cubes gone; now, only ice pieces.

The sixth ice to melt: looking like gate crashers at the after-awarding dinner where we came first, ate first, and finished first with our casual shirts and maong get-ups vis-a-vis the other guests formal polos and elegant dresses. Afterwards, an hour and a half stay in EdTech to help Alexis in the budget proposal of his show for their BroadQuest competition the day after.

A water-filled pail. Overflowing, soothing, relaxing.

I scooped the first pitcher of water and dampened my head. Cold, but good. I filled it second and dampened my body. Cold, and great.

The third time, it equally dampened me from head to foot.

Nice to end a day with an ice-cold bath, with a reminiscence of good memories coming with the melting of the ice in the water of your everyday bath.

---

Snapshots of the Day
(photos by Meng)

Anchoring TNB for Wednesday, March 24

A number of the TOMCAT Seniors

I am a Thomasian

My AB uniform never looked this good.

Excited to take off my blouse when I got home

Because before and after our Baccalaureate Mass last Saturday (March 19), we were so enthused writing on one other's polo's and blouses.

Wado writing on Man's armpit

UST Baccalaureate Mass: always amongst the best and memorable events.

The candle to light and the Thomasian Pledge

Pagmamahal sa Diyos, karununungang may dangal. Ako'y nagagalak matawag na isang Tomasino.

---

Having a hard time writing. My dear passionate heart, breathe in, breathe out.

Prayer to St. Joseph

In celebration of St. Joseph's feast day, pray this beautiful prayer by Paulo Coelho (as he also requested in his blog), preferably at 8.30 pm.

Glorious St. Joseph
model of all who are devoted to labor,
obtain for me the grace
to work conscientiously by placing love of duty above my inclinations;
to gratefully and joyously deem it an honor to employ and to develop by labor
the gifts I have received from God,
to work methodically, peacefully,
in moderation and patience,
without ever shrinking from it through difficulty to work;
above all, with purity of intention and unselfishness,
having unceasingly before my eyes
the account I have to render of time lost,
talents unused, good not done,
and vain complacency in success.
St. Joseph, inspire and guide me for the time to come.

---

Today is our Baccalaureate Mass; consequently, our last, precious time to wear our uniform that has always been highschool-ish in style.

And yes, a Thomasian graduate of 2010.

Happy :) But also sad. Things to leave, people to leave.

A life to leave... for another life to be lived.

And so a call to grow up. Grow up, not grow old.

Congratulations, fellow graduates of Batch 2010! :))

In Defense of

Defending our thesis entitled Influence of Newspaper Reading Practices of Parents on the Newspaper Reading Practices of College Students of the University of Sto. Tomas.

We were all prepared when our first panelist came in and only gave us remarks on our paper. Then we're OK. Wow, amen!

Second panelist: cutting our presentation short and giving lots of congratulations after, then two questions. And we're done. Wow again, amen!

Thank You, Lord! :)

After "Defense" to our first panelist

"E-mail me your thesis at..."

Lunch together at Max's, SM San Lazaro

... Then Videoke! Hit it, Cath!

Congratulations, elves! Mother elf, singing elf, editing elf, acting elf, emo-in elf, debating elf. Job well done!

Also, to the Strawberry Juice Productions for the award-bagging short film Silverwind. :)

To Live is to Love

"It's not when I breathe, but when I love, that I live."

Gissele kept on uttering this a while ago during our informal broadjourn class. We were doing last minute review and reading for our Media Law recitation, when she suddenly shared it.

On the first time I heard it, I answered with a dint of sarcasm, "And so I don't live, because I don't love. So I better stop breathing?"

When will I feel excited and enthused again when I wake up every morning, whispering lovely words in a prayer for the presence of someone who never fails to make me happy, contented, cherished and loved? When I will get my phone flooded with message in a bright morning, not for any announcement, favor, assignment or meeting, but for a sweet "Good Morning" with a character smiley of varying styles and shapes? When even in the midst of traffic, I don't hurry, or in the middle of slow-walking people I don't get pissed off, because I know the clock stops on the 24th to freeze for another hour which I call my 25th?

And on that 25th hour, I will be with that someone.

The world stops for two people whose lips do not move, but whose hearts understand each other because of their intent eyes discovering the depths of their soul.

If a person is praying for someone, and that someone is praying for another, whose wishful prayer is going to be granted?

Am I praying for the right person?